A reader sent in this photo of a car on Freeman St in Greenpoint with a license plate that reads “DiHpster.” I doubt it’s the “real” Die Hipster; he actually isn’t that dumb as to call himself out to NYC. This is just sad.

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Why didn’t anybody break the windows and stuffed the MF’s car with dog shit?
As residents of this block of Freeman Street know all too well, the silly license plate is about the least antisocial and unneighborly thing about this vehicle’s owner. It is one of FOUR (4!!) rusting jalopies belonging by the same guy, whose only objective appears to be moving the vehicles back and forth across the street so as to comply with street cleaning rules: They almost never leave the block. They don’t appear capably road-ready anyway, it is suspiciously remarkable they even have inspection stickers, and I’d be highly shocked to learn they all are insured. Hard to tell in the photo, but the car as pictured there is in a line with his three other junkers spaced between a curb cut for a business and a fire hydrant across square footage sufficient to accommodate SIX cars if parked conscientiously. Put another way, this one guy’s four cars, which he does not ever use, occupy 100% of the available street parking for the 15 families living in the building immediately alongside it. At some point this neighborhood will need to adopt resident parking permits and/or crack down on what looks to be the world’s least successful and most unneighborly used car lot.
I should say by the way that other than the circumstance of this particular license plate having become an especially ironic message of hostility to neighbors, I get a kick out of the whole “Die Hipster” satire. Why, just the other day I saw Shaw the linguini-armed part-time barista use his his dad’s credit card to purchase a fair-trade certified messenger bag made entirely of organic dried kale stems and beard hair…